~God's Plans~ 3 minutes~

It is always amazing to me the plans God has for me...

a year before I got pregnant as a teen if someone had said I would be a teen mom, I would've laughed SO hard at them and said not me, I can't do that..not saying God wanted that for me, but He allowed it to happen, and yes a consequence of my actions, but He truly blessed me with Kel...

a year before I had JJ, and learned about HLHS, and what half a heart really meant, if someone had said I would have a son who would go through 3 open heart surgeries by two years of age, and then a lifetime of medicine and more surgeries as needed, and a pacemaker, and many restrictions, I would have said NO WAY, I can't handle that...

and then at 3 when he was diagnosed with Autism, had someone told me I would not only have a son with a physical disability, or as I prefer to say "special heart", but now he has special needs and his mental ability would be different I would have said, ABSOLUTELY NOT, I can NOT handle that too....

if someone had told me my marriage would go through times that hurt me in a way I can not describe, and I would make choices that are crazy and not of me...and vice versa...yet my marriage would not only survive but my husband would become my best friend, I would tell them they were NUTS, I would never stay through that, I couldn't handle it.....

and you know many more situations like this in my life, I would have said if given a warning before, "no way, I can't handle that"...and at that time I would have been right, because I didn't need to handle that, it wasn't my time....and yet when each of these situations came, and they all did....I didn't have to handle anything, God took over....HE came in with His tools, of love, guidance, security, strength beyond understanding, wisdom, courage....and He carried me with these tools through everyone of these....so I didn't have to walk through them alone, because He knew exactly what I needed and when...and His plans have ALWAYS brought pure joy to my life, even when the rough spots seemed they would last forever...He brought me though...

but He isn't done bringing me through the unexpected, and He isn't through with me yet....

3 minutes....but it felt like at least twenty....

the only 3 minutes of the beach I would never want to relive,

but PRAISING God for His hands....

we were walking out into the ocean and we weren't going far so we didn't put JJ's life jacket on him...there was a sandbar, but we must have walked on the side of it, because we were going into deeper water and I was carrying JJ...Fabi, Kel, my mom stopped before this, and Alicia felt it deeper so she turned around with Ryan...John had made it on the sandbar with Tyler....and I had JJ...about the time i attempted to turn around and go back with him a current swept me into water I could no longer touch, and only within a foot or so of where I had been...but a wave came and another, and JJ panicked...he began pushing me under in fear, and one after another waves came over us...I remember seeing Alicia and screaming help...she had Ryan...and she ran back as fast as she could to hand him off to help...in the mean time Fabian came darting out, but didn't realize I couldn't touch, he just thought JJ was freaked and I couldn't get him...so Fabian grabbed JJ before realizing he couldn't touch...and JJ still fliiping, and kicking, kicked Fabian under....and now as I tried to regain some strength and get a breathe, I could see JJ and Fabian going under....and the waves just kept coming...I looked at one point and only saw Fabian and yelled JJ as loud as I could, and then Fabi pulled JJ out by an arm...and he went under again...by now I was in constant prayer with God, and had been, and just thought this can not be it...and I knew I had to try to get JJ back, because Fabi couldn't get him as he was still pushing and freaking....I grabbed JJ back...still barely able to control him, I began to go forward and thought, I will just pull him, whatever I can...I looked up and saw Alicia who said, "Give him to me"....you need to know my sister is the littlest of us all, but in that moment I heard God say, go, I got him, give him to her....I knew God had JJ....and Alicia took him and was able to restrain his arms go to her back and he calmed quickly...and she was able to float on her back with him...and get to touching sand.........that day I almost lost JJ...myself....and Fabian...that day had someone told me their story I would have said NO WAY I CAN'T HANDLE THAT...and I would have been right...God was our lifeguard that day, everyday...He has bigger plans for all of us, He wasn't and isn't done with us...not JJ, not me, not Fabian....what a powerful and loving God....wow....and yes that MAY have been 3 minutes, probably even less...but it felt like forever....and God brought us through....I NEVER want to relive that, and it was a wonderful reminder of the oceans abilities, and we got right back in after, but stayed where JJ couldn't touch, but we will NEVER forget the day God saved us...I will NEVER forget the day God saved JJ, again...and even Kel who God stopped before she was even above her waist...God's plans are set, we are here for a time and can't go one day sooner...even in the unexplainable things that happen, He has a plan....and that day His plan was to save each of us...and for us to continue on our journey He has in store for us...

PRAISE GOD, PRAISE HIM

I am forever thankful, for all the things in my life that I would say if ask before they happened, "No way I can't handle that"...to when they come I say "Only through God do I have the strength and tools, it is He who gets ALL the glory, and praises, what an AWEsome and All Mighty Powerful God" Amen.

Sparklers...Camp...EIGHT Years...Appts..DUCK...Beach..and what comes Next

I am amazed at how this summer is flying by and with it my time to stop and just think for a clear second, and MAYBE get out a coherent word or two on here...if I am lucky =D

Of course, JJ AKA Orange Kitten, takes any hope of coherency away, ALL DONE WITH LOVE, and so I find myself writing later at night...this can't help in that clarity factor, because of my sleepiness, so at ANY point if you are unclear of what I am saying, well you're not alone because that means SO AM I...lol...

So...we had an amazing 4th of July, where JJ did his first ever sparkler, and maybe loved it a little too much, I hope this doesn't bring out the clepto in him ;-0 ..taking that almost a month has passed I will say we are safe..for now...but nonetheless we had a wonderful time and shared it with friends and my moma came for the fireworks, which we are able to shoot at our home, we love that part! Kel cheered us on in her always cheerful way, and she helped with JJ...it was a great time!

hummmm next Kel started her 3rd year in writers camp, two weeks later she created a masterpiece in my opinion, and I am just so encouraged by her talent and her ability to use it...she had a wonderful camp and I am thankful we are able to send her each year, thanks Mom, you are awesome for doing this for her!

In the middle of camp, Fabian and I celebrated our EIGHT year wedding anniversary, and if you are on my facebook, you knew this already, lol...by NO means was that a bragging right or anything of the sorts, that is just not me, it was a CELEBRATION and giving GOD ALL the glory, because I promise everyone of you it is ONLY through God and His grace in our life that we have made it to 8yrs! The mountains we have climbed have been huge, and we are talking hills, like Mt. Everest high...and when one or both of us wanted to call it quits and just fall back down the mountain, God stepped in and said "Let me take over from here"...and slowly through many ups and downs we have learned to put God in the center and go from there...and the downs will come again, but this time, they are more like mole hills...and God is so great to bring us to our EIGHT year anniversary, for this is am eternally grateful, and for the many more to come...we got to go out too =D My wonderful moma once again came over, and she watched the kiddos while we got to enjoy dinner and a movie, and then part two came while we were at the Beach (story coming) and we got to go out to dinner and a walk on the beach! We celebrated God and His work in our lives...

So after our anniversary, or maybe even before, but somewhere in the mix we've had appts...JJ had a WONDERFUL 1 month after heart cath check up! He is doing absolutely amazing and I praise God for this...in a couple months we will be celebrating his 6th birthday!!! Wow, I just can't believe it! This is a TRUE miracle....and the check up was great and we go back in November/December! I have had some doctors appts and visits and a few more coming in the next month...so far God is working in me, nothing serious, but just lift them in prayer, and God is working...nonetheless they take alot of time, and this is not the fun part of the summer...so please just pray for that =D...

DUCK....well ducks really...lol....we had a fun day of feeding ducks at the park, JJ's first again, and it was a blast, and JJ thought feeding them out of his hand was best, and although he avoided being bit, he did have to learn to throw the bread for them, it was funny..and I am thankful for that memory!

The BEACH, which I would love to refer to as my future home...WOW, it had been years since i had been to the beach and with JJ's health was not possible, so Kel has been able to go with my mom, but not me...and JJ had never been, and Fabi hadn't been in years...so we took off to Port Aransas, with all of us, PLUS mom, and Alicia, John and their two little guys...and it was AMAZING...it was a true blessing...and I seriously would love to live there....we had a fun and wonderful beach house, and enjoyed every moment...OK there was 3minutes of the entire trip we didn't enjoy, but that is the next blog...yes 3 minutes of our trip deserves its own blog...but it was so much fun, and i can't remember the last time i have felt that relaxed, and carefree...and God was ALL over us, and I am so thankful...almost can't describe in words...but can't wait to go back!

And whats next..well Kel is currently at Church Camp, and I know having a great time, I am missing her like crazy, it's very hard on me...today is day 4, and 3 more to go...I am so thankful for her chance to go, but I REALLY miss her like crazy, can't wait to hear her voice!....and

well I bought school supplies, YEP its around the corner..and I am truly sad...

this summer has been amazing, and such a gift from God, and I can't imagine not being with my kids everyday...we've bonded in new ways, we've grown together as a family...and we've shared many new things...it seems sad to know we have less than a month....so what comes next for the last of summer??? I don't know....but I will be sure to write about it ;-)