~Runnin' on Joy~

I would say the majority of you know my catch phrase, or have atleast seen it on something I write or send out "~Runnin' on Joy~" In all of the crazy of life, that just found me and STUCK! Maybe over stuck, as I use it in everything...but honestly I can't get it to un-stick and I don't know that I would want to...once in a while as I update my facebook, I don't have it at the end of an update....and it almost feels like it's left out and lost, because in a strange but TRULY real way that has become a part of me! I always feel like I am runnin' on joy...and that JOY in just a part of me...even on the days when I am hurting, or truly sad...as I am praying for it to stop or for God to show me what this pain might be for...He is SO gracious to bring that saying to me, and remind me...and through it all I HAVE to smile...because just the saying brings that joy to me...

In life I have gone in some pretty ROUGH, to say the least, directions and the paths that I have gone down have been very... well if I told you they'd sound almost unreal...and you know they would be unreal and untrue about who I AM NOW...they are stories about who I WAS...but this past Sunday during our sermon one small part talked about how when people give testimonies lets say 30min long, 20 min is about the rough life and their past, 5min about the transformation God made, and 5min about who they are now...and he noted that nothing is wrong with that, and people like to see how God truly has worked in someones life....but should our testimony of how we came to Christ be about Christ for the bulk...WOW when I heard this it was as if a light turned on and I thought YES!!! YES it should be...and why do I want to hear about someones misery, I want to hear about God's glory...and it made complete since that I don't necessarily enjoy telling about my past, and yet sometimes it seems I should...and I never walk away feeling any better....in fact as I relived some of my past one day with a friend I remember them saying , "Wow, I never experienced that, I wish I had those years before marriage, I wish I just had one of those nights like you had"....my response was rather abrupt and short, "NO YOU DON'T...one of those nights, cost me years of my innocence and it wasn't worth it...I would take years of the "boring" stuff, for any one of my nights to not have happened" This past Sunday our pastor shared a similar story...and I found myself with tears...but different tears...tears of YES exactly! and THEN tears of thankfulness that God has made in me a new person, and he gave me back, in a sense, my innocence...no I can't undo, or go back, but he cleansed me..and through Him I am whole again!

So my testimony for anyone who ever wonders goes like this....

There are many stories I could share, of the past, my choices, and the brokenness I felt on a daily, sometimes hourly basis...some of those choices will stay with me forever....however, I won't be sharing those stories, and idolizing things in my past that don't deserve to be idolized...and in fact I won't be sharing many of them again...just to say the path I walked before Christ was ugly, hurtful, damaging, and truly a deadly path spiritually, but also physically. The day I realized I needed more, that I knew God was missing in my life, was one of those days...but this time when God had my face in the dirty ground, and I was literally wiping dirt from my mouth, I HEARD Him...LOUD and CLEAR....I saw in my daughter face, sadness and fear...and I KNEW something had to be different...and maybe a month later, I found myself in church...and realized God knew, not me, He knew I needed Him, and this time He knew I would hear...my path into becoming a Christian wasn't typical..and I am so thankful for the mentors God has sent me throughout those years to keep me walking and help me learn about God! My sister was the first of many who opened my eyes and heart to God...and He just kept them coming! Within 1 month of becoming a Christian, I was pregnant...and my marriage well was not what it is today...I was so unsure, but I knew to trust God...and within 5 months of becoming a Christian I knew my son who I was pregnant with was going to have only 1/2 a heart...OMGoodness, God KNEW I needed Him, and I am thankful for the dirt in my mouth that night, because I wouldn't have survived it otherwise...the next years of our lives were a whirlwind of blur...and the only thing I can say for sure is God was ALL over our family in EVERY way, and still is....and He teaches me one thing I can't go a day without...FAITH...pure, Innocent FAITH...my faith in God is my ROCK...God is MY ROCK and REDEEMER, and truly the Alpha Omega...and through that Faith, God gives me HIS joy, PURE joy, and that my friends is why I am Runnin' on Joy, through Faith in a God who never breaks His promises, who IS love, but IS just...who is LIFE, but also Sovereign...that is my walk..that is my testimony...but this is God's Story....

~Runnin' on HIS joy~

"Wisconsin" . . . said with a Texan immitating a Wisconsin Accent ;-)

Wow...21 hours after leaving Texas and stops and breakfast along the way, we made it to Wisconsin, last week!!! It was amazing!!! And shockingly the car trip was great and fun! I met SO many new family members and loved every moment!

I feel so blessed that my husband has such wonderful family, and I get to share that with him...I do wish they lived closer so we could share our lives together more often! BUT I can promise it won't be 8 more years before we go again!

We got to visit the Milwaukee Zoo which is AMAZINg!!! Wow I was so impressed and we had such a wonderful time!

And we will be going back there too!

I didn't stick out too bad with my Texas Accent, OR everyone was just too nice to mention it!

I am thankful I was able to meet all the wonderful cousins, or most, and especially all the ones we talk to on facebook! I think that was wonderful!

OH and incase you didn't know, apparently ALL his cousins agreed that JJ is a SPITTING image of Fabian...IMAGE THAT! lol...not just in looks, but the way he played, and ran all over...every cousin said Fabi was the SAME WAY! I love it! What a blessing! It was so special to hear stories and just laugh together!

And although Fabi and me will hit our 8yr anniversary in July, I have always felt I have known him most my life, and after sharing this passed week with him, I think in a weird way I have...we were truly eachothers gift from God and sharing this experience just grew us even closer! We miss you all in Wisconsin and can't wait to go back! OH and if ANY of you want to brave the Texas heat, our door is always open!!!

Here are some random pictures from the trip!

You have to entertain yourself when everyone is asleep besides you! =)

Just a few of the pictures...to see them all go to:

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2018702&id=1593619172&l=eb283c017b

and

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2018735&id=1593619172&l=3eb18540a8

They will all be there, and you don't need a facebook account to see them!

What a wonderful trip!!

Surprises!!!

I happen to be a fan of most surprises...I have friends who despise them, me on the other hand like them...mostly

Don't get me wrong, I can't stand when someone says they need to talk to me later, or they have a surprise for me later...OH waiting is torture, lol...and my hubby would say I am the WORST, not at waiting, but saying those things...he is probably right! I do like to give surprises, or news, but only the good stuff, not bad!

Some surprises in my life i could have done without, but usually those end of being better than i could have imagined! You know..like being told I was pregnant at 15- SURPRISE! lol...but yet it, SHE has been one of my biggest joys...and SURPRISE your son have a major heart condition...yep another moment I would say I didn't want to hear that one either, yet God has brought SO much good from that too!

I have learned that sometimes the fun surprises don't end up being the best ones! My children both came with surprises...and yet they are my greatest gifts from God and JOYS!!!

Now other surprises like... oh we changed the plan at the last minute, are probably my least favorite to be honest...and God has REALLY REALLY had to work on me in the area, because I like a plan, I like things set, and I am not always flexible when I need to be! Like planning a trip and trying to get the details set...or like tonight driving to an event that was mia...and even double checking the calendar...still NO clue what happened, but God truly intervened, because I just shrugged and said oh well we tried, and we laughed! It was GREAT! And then God honored that by creating a wonderful evening with a yummy dinner, where my hubby got home just in time...and then when we stopped at a friends house just to say hi, we ended up staying for 3+ hours and laughing and talking!!! WOW! That is a total God thing....so I think when I just let God take the lead..and except surprises good and bad with Him in control, well life has a lot more joy and love..and that I will take ANY day!

"Instead you ought to say, "If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that" James 4:15

June ALREADY!

How do you lose time?!?!?! I don't know but I do ALL the time, lol...it just seems to disappear and somehow I miss time...SO it is JUNE already and most of you know that Kelli ROCKED on her TAKS test and in Hutto this year that means she got out of school TWO weeks early!!! It has been awesome to have her with me, and I am SO proud of her!!! Not only did she do amazing on the TAKS, BUT she only missed 2 on her Math and 1 on her Reading !!!!! She is extremely smart and I am thrilled with her hard work! For JJ her gets out tomorrow, and he has done amazing this year! I am proud of him too! He is going to be in KINDERGARTEN!!!!! I am floored and just amazed at how much he has grown in the last 3 years! Wow...both my children take my breathe away, literally!

He will begin next year in full time Lifeskills for the first 30 days to get him use to a new teacher and routine after 3 years, and then he will slowly be introduced into the Kindergarten class! This is so exciting and I am very proud of him! In one on one settings he is on and above level in all catergories, however in a classroom setting he does fall below, guess he likes what he sees around him ;-) so he gets distracted and has a hard time focusing. I can't help but still be okay with that, because how many times as a parent can we find the exact tool we need to help out our children, that can be so tough! But with the wonderful evaluations of his teachers, aids, therapists, and specialist, we have come up with a plan individualized for JJ, WOW! This is from God, I couldn't be more excited and thankful!

So for this summer we have a packed, but fun schedule!

We take off in a week for Wisconsin to visit all of Fabians family, and both kids have summer camps...well Kelli is all set, and prayfully I found one for JJ, to be confirmed tomorrow! This should be a fun and busy time..but I will blog as much as I can!

What a great 08-09 school year for all of us and summer has come just in time for some fun!