Hurt and Gods work!

Hurt is a really funny thing (well not really) , or interesting thing..especially in the way people handle it, or react because of it... God has REALLY grown me in this area and I am just very humbled as He reveals more to me about how He would like me to handle being hurt, and how to handle if I hurt someone... the hardest thing sometimes is to say sorry when we hurt another person ,and I can't say I fully understand why that is..yet at one point or another in my life I have been that person..but it is very humbling as God has changed that in me.. As all of us I have people in my life who have hurt me, and God has graciously shown me how to love those people, but some of them from a distance, when needed.. this has been freeing! 2009 I walked through ALOT of this..in my marriage, my kids, some "friends" (which I put into quotes, because TRUE friends can hurt you, but these were people I called friends, but the ways they hurt me were revealing that they are not TRUE friends), and hurt by being alone, hurting God..all this saying that 2009 was a HUGE growth year for me..(as in each year, just different areas) The first of healing from hurt was in my marriage! PRAISE GOD! 2008 was a tough year that we went through and in Nov 2008, I stopped listening to those around me who gave me advise of this world and I only listened to GOD..who spoke VERY clearly and without hesitation I heard "THIS IS YOUR MARRIAGE, YOU GAVE YOUR LIFE TO ME, YOU GAVE YOUR MARRIAGE TO ME, AND YOU DON'T GET TO HAVE IT BACK, YOU LOVE YOUR HUSBAND FOR WHO HE IS, AND HE WILL SEE ME IN YOU..YOU HONOR YOUR HUSBAND FOR BEING THE LEADER OF YOUR HOME AND HE WILL SEE ME...YOU SUBMIT TO YOUR HUSBAND AS A WIFE AND HE WILL SEE ME...YOU ACCEPT YOUR HUSBAND FOR WHO HE IS AND HE WILL SEE ME...YOU LISTEN TO HIM WITHOUT DISAGREEING AND HE WILL SEE ME...YOU GIVE HIM YOUR WHOLE HEART AND STOP HOLDING BACK AND HE WILL SEE ME...YOU LET GO AND TRULY FORGIVE THE PAST AND HE WILL SEE ME...YOU LOVE HIM WHETHER HE DESERVES OR EARNS IT AND HE WILL SEE ME...AND I PROMISE THAT IT WILL BE HARD BUT I AM HERE AND YOU DO THESE THINGS TO HONOR ME AND HE WILL SEE ME..HE WILL COME TO KNOW ME..AND I LOVE YOU FOR COMING TO ME AND TURNING FROM THIS WORLD" so I did...I did everything God ask me to do, and it was HARD..and it HURT..but this time the hurt was different, it was about God and not me..and God held me through the beginning of what would end up being breath taking.. I did a "love dare" of sorts..this is what God brought into my life in Nov 2008, and I didn't want to, but I did..by Christmas I was head over heals in love again..and yet there was healing to do..I am constantly reminded of God's words to me..and that is what held me... little did I know then how this would all turn out! So begins 2010.. and I am married to my BEST FRIEND..I mean it..just yesterday I said something not thinking and my husband let me know it hurt him..I didn't realize what I said..and I had tears coming down my face, not crying, just TEARS..this is HUGE..my heart broke at the realization of hurting him, and instead of being defensive or saying a quick sorry and trying to move on..I couldn't! I had tears that wouldn't stop coming as I SO very humbly apologized..it was WONDERFUL..that was GOD in me, coming out, changing me..and guess what my husband saw that in me, in my eyes, and his forgiveness felt like the best gift I have ever received (outside the forgiveness of God, of course!)..because in my hurt and his, we weren't alone , God was there and it didn't turn into a fight, or anyone walking away mad, because true sorrow was offered and true forgiveness was given!! ALL IN LESS THAN FIVE MINUTES! And we moved on from those moments and the were gone..and we didn't let it ruin our day, we had the Best day together! oh and Gods word to me..well my husband saw, everything God said he would, he did...and my husband sees GOD..he sees God through me, in me..and now in himself..I see God in my husband and let me bluntly say there is NO greater turn on than that..I find my husband so attractive and my heart overflows with love as I see God working in him..it is an amazing thing! Healing from Hurt in "Friends"...friendships can be tough, because no matter how much we try, we are not always 100% open with friendships, or I haven't always been..but I had always held back because of the fear of being hurt by a friend, that is pain that goes so very very deep..and I let that fear/guard up..I opened my heart fully to "friends"..and guess what??? HURT..and not normal I wasn't a great friend hurt..I mean very deceptive, slander, gossip, and painful hurt..I was absolutely devastated...and in those moments, over a year ago..I didn't react how I would now...I reacted in hurt with hurt..I was angry, and I didn't like confrontation, so I just stayed hurt and carried that ... and when the waves settled I just went on like it was okay, when it wasn't...but through this God revealed to me what TRUE Godly friendship was suppose to look like..He allowed me to be alone alot, which helped and hurt..and He helped me to forgive those who had hurt me, and yet taught me that I didn't have to go back and "fix" everything as I so often did..and His blessing to me as I went through this and prayed for a Godly woman to have a friendship with, well He blessed me abundantly! I have a "besty" whose heart for God is amazing, she is strong and filled with love! And we became besties through her fight for her life..God spoke to me, on how to help and I never knew that His plan was to have her in my life as such a close amazing friend..it's been a total God thing! But God didn't stop there, He has continued to bring Godly women in my life, whose support and strength inspire me to grow closer to Christ! And I PRAISE God for the hurt of those "friends", because He has grown me into a stronger, BETTER, very open, loving, yet very truthful friend..I have a wonderful group of women who hold me, keep me accountable, speak GOD'S truth and love to me..and who except my imperfections, and yet don't allow those to be hindrances or excuses for me to use! And I do all this for them!! I LOVE THIS!!! THAT IS TRUE FRIENDSHIP...I pray that God will keep bringing those women/friends in my life..because it has blessed me abundantly! And the exciting part in all this, well it is God it not done yet..He is teaching me daily how to walk through hurts, and pain..He is so gracious and loving when I feel so weak, and I wait for His answer before I react..sometimes that comes in split seconds, sometimes hours, sometimes days..but the end result is that I am less of this world and that is humbling to me.. "A truthful witness gives honest testimony,but a false witness tells lies. Reckless words pierce like a sword,but the tongue of the wise brings healing. Truthful lips endure forever,but a lying tongue lasts only a moment. There is deceit in the hearts of those who plot evil,but joy for those who promote peace. No harm befalls the righteous,but the wicked have their fill of trouble. The Lord detests lying lips,but he delights in men who are truthful. A prudent man keeps his knowledge to himself,but the heart of fools blurts out folly." Proverbs 12:17-23